Why consider Islam over Catholicism?

I write this blog as I consider converting to Islam.

What made me, a life-long cradle Catholic, contemplate converting to Islam? For the purpose of this blog, I will limit myself to just 5 of the main reasons which I list below in order of personal priority.

1) Islam is the fastest growing religion in the world today.

This is a fact, which can be referred to here in this Pew research Center study & as can be seen in this Chat GPT graphs below which shows the rise of Islam (blue line below) as against Christianity (the orange line below).
Top graph depicts actual trend of growth in Christianity and Islam, while lower graph is a projected linear extrapolation of the growth in the next 20 years. (Source: Chat GPT, based on Pew Research data)
Top graph depicts actual trend of growth in Christianity and Islam, while lower graph is a projected linear extrapolation of the growth in the next 20 years. (Source: Chat GPT, based on Pew Research data)
My reasoning is: it would be great to be on the winning team here (i.e Islam). After all, after the collapse of Western Christianity since 1960, there is only one contender to be the dominant religion 20+ years from now. With all other religions emphasizing a sort of ‘tolerance’ that was unheard of in the past, Islam is the only religion that has the ability to be dominant and perhaps even be the religion of preference. Why should I not want to be on the winning team? 

2) Islam is unchanging in it’s beliefs, & its adherents are united.

Ask any Islamic, cleric or otherwise, who is well versed with the history of Islam. Ask them if the Quran was subject to ‘historic-critical’ methods. Ask them if they deal in hackneyed & absurd ‘possibilities’ such as “God ‘could’ have used evolution”. Ask them if they deal with contextual criticism. Ask them if they have different versions/translations of the Quran. Ask them if anything that is confined within the Quran regarding various subjects (homosexuality, women priests, the role of women in the public sphere, etc.) are up for revision based on the ‘progress’ and changes in how Muslims want to live their lives in the modern world. Ask them if they feel embarrassed about their reverence for Allah and going on their knees during their prayers. Compare this with the weak custom ushered in after Vatican II, of receiving the Body and Blood of Jesus in the hand by almost all Novus Ordo Catholics today, as against kneeling and receiving the Eucharist prior to the changes of Vatican II. Clearly Islam is more consistent with their faith and beliefs.

In context with homosexuality as an example, sure, there are Muslim homosexuals even in the higher echelons of power – for example, the now deceased Sultan of Oman, Qaboos Bin Said, while a very humane and noble person, was rumoured (credibly, I must add) to be a homosexual, as reported by Gay Influence. However, it should be noted that these leaders were not going around making demands for the Quran’s teaching to be reinterpreted based on their deformed sexuality. They submitted to the Quran and to Islamic teaching.

Moreover, there are seldom differences or disunity within the Islamic communities, and when it comes to the core concerns of Islam (Israel, slandering Prophet Mohamed, etc.), they rally together and are willing to ‘die to self’ in being vocal and even ‘physical’ at times (we must rest assured in the ‘truth’ of the narrative that Islam is a religion of peace – if you think otherwise you are an Islamophobe).

3) Polygamy license

This is a no-brainer. Want multiple sexual and marital partners? Want to hook up with underage women (i.e. children)? No other religion provides a license like Islam. You live the life fit for a king. Imagine coming home and deciding which wife you will <ahem> reside with today? Imagine coming home with a load of stress and worry and having two or three women fawn over and baby you – while one attends to the kids, and another to the children, and the third devoting herself entirely to your service. Imagine if one of the wives wants to talk about her exhausting day and the kids, and you aren’t really up to it, she can speak her heart out with one of the other wives. Imagine being able to have a ménage à trois on demand – provided the wives have been successfully ‘re-educated’ that this is Allah’s will for them! The possibilities are vast. So why would any warm-blooded male, not choose Islam over other highly repressive religions such as Christianity that advocate a single-wife system? Why consider the Biblical teaching of Christ in Matthew 19:4–6: where He cites Genesis 2:24, “So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man put asunder.”? Like I said, it is time to move on from repressive and ‘rigid’ traditions.

4) Free Perks

Are you a refugee? Are you marginalized? Do you want to immigrate to Western Countries but are unable to because of the expensive and difficult legal requirements? Have no fear. Because as a Muslim, you are ‘entitled’ to play the victim card.

You are ‘entitled’ to freebies if you are already in the system, and if you are not, you are ‘entitled’ to demand refugee status. Do you want low-cost housing? Or low-interest mortgage or student loans? Muslims get preferential treatment thanks to their leaders who have wormed their way into the legal and political system in Western countries. Even if Muslims demand mosque after mosque along with blaring loudspeaker-calls to prayers in Western countries, or even Sharia Law, the sky is the limit for Muslims. if people dare to criticize or question their intent, we can immediately play the victim and call them an Islamophobe. The psychological play is fool proof! No matter what happens, Islam wins!

5) Respect for women

If you are a Catholic, especially a Semi Trad or Rad Trad variety, this is bound to resonate with you. Forget veils in church for women. If you are the Novus Ordo variety, forget suffering from the guilt of secretly ogling at the low-necked, short skirted or tight-jeaned, buxom Novus Ordo lass in front of you, who you are mentally ‘having your way with’ against all prior confessional resolve. Islam solves all the problems with simple and practical steps – women have to be covered from head to toe in public. Not even bikinis on beaches. No torn jeans in colleges. No stupid fads that expose more than the eyes or the feet – Effective. Simple. Practical. And the women don’t mind this either. After all which God fearing and chaste woman wants to be the subject of the lecherous, drooling, porn-infested man, who heaven-forbid, may be into other morbid & violent fetishes? And if Muslim men are found to be violent towards women in Western Countries, all is still not lost. Remember that a two-tier policy of justice exists – the Muslim man must blame the Western woman for her lifestyle, her more than casual and revealing attire, etc. At the end of the day, it is the fault of the woman that forced the Muslim man to carry out rape, violence, and even murders. In every situation, the Muslim man is the ultimate victim.

There may be other contenders to the above listed top 5 reasons to consider Islam, (example: the 72 virgins promised to martyrs in paradise. Be honest. Which man wouldn’t want a post-dated cheque on that promise?) but for now, the 5 points should be enough to hard-sell Islam to mostly clueless Catholics. You can see from my above points that Islam clearly works. From its fundamentals, to the perks and freebies, Islam is a religion meant for the zealot in you. If you have been frustrated by Catholic leaders who have taken to kissing the Quran publicly,

Pope John Paul II kisses the Quran (source: ‘Inside the Vatican’)
Pope John Paul II kisses the Quran (source: ‘Inside the Vatican’)
If you are a Catholic who is perhaps confused by the leeway & latitude given by Catholic teaching in the Catechism instituted in 1992, which states,

“The plan of salvation also includes those who acknowledge the Creator, in the first place amongst whom are the Muslims; these profess to hold the faith of Abraham, and together with us they adore the one, merciful God, mankind’s judge on the last day” (CCC 841).

Remember that this is because one day Islam will be a One-World Religion. And Catholicism will bow before it on that day. So, it makes all practical sense to join Islam today! Forget the totalitarian prospects from what we have come to see from Iran or the Taliban and some of the terrorist outfits like Hamas and others. Islam is a peaceful, loving, and tolerant religion; and you can take my word for it. If you don’t agree, you are a bigot.

Ave Maria

(This is a satirical piece and if you cannot see the veiled sarcasm, I cannot help you)

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